Medicine & Machinery
nuts & bolts!
posted 7 hours ago + 1 note

okay but

let’s talk about neurax worms

these little shits will BURROW INTO YOUR BRAIN AND TAKE SHIT OVER

THEYRE BADASS AS HELL

#ooc #I WANT LIKE 10000 #EXCEPT NOT BUT #THEYRE KIND OF CUTE TOO


posted 7 hours ago + 1 note

my art skills are shit right now but

tesla secretly makes soldierbots fight each other so he can yell like the announcer dude from mortal kombat

FINISH HIM.

#muse shaming #headcanon #headcanons #finish him.


posted 7 hours ago + 24 notes — via robotbutnotarobot
ametalmerc → ANON, VHAT ZHE FUCK

robotbutnotarobot:

ametalmerc:

robotbutnotarobot:

robotbutnotarobot:

Loud screeching and sparking and dying robot noises oh god the pain. 

"H-HhelP=PP=??! m, ,…"

 

"Thhhhanks." Max nodded and leaned against the wall, his fans still scraping the sides of his vents. 

After a few minutes, he spoke up again. 

"…I-I might bbbbe brokken, a-aactually…" 

"No problem."

Tesla sort of cringed hearing the fans and the vents still scratching at each other.

"…Are you 100% sure you don’t vant somevon to try und help you?"

"N-NNnno… P-Pleaase helpp…" He whined and whirred. 

"Alright, hold on."

And literally out of what seemed to be nowhere, he took out a toolkit and began the inspection.

"Holy crap."

#robotbutnotarobot


posted 7 hours ago + 24 notes — via robotbutnotarobot
ametalmerc → ANON, VHAT ZHE FUCK

robotbutnotarobot:

ametalmerc:

robotbutnotarobot:

ametalmerc:

robotbutnotarobot:

Loud screeching and sparking and dying robot noises oh god the pain. 

"H-HhelP=PP=??! m, ,…"

 

He let out an electronic sigh.

"Vell. Let’s just hope zhat nozhing has gone fatally wrong."

"O-Okayyyyy." He sighed in relief and went limp. "B-But could you pppplug me in t-to charggggE? I’m ttttired, aa-aand my arms w-wwwon’t wwwwork."

"Alright. Hold on a second."

It took Tesla a minute to figure out where exactly the plugs were in the room and the plug on Max.

"Zhere you go."

"Thhhhanks." Max nodded and leaned against the wall, his fans still scraping the sides of his vents. 

After a few minutes, he spoke up again. 

"…I-I might bbbbe brokken, a-aactually…" 

"No problem."

Tesla sort of cringed hearing the fans and the vents still scratching at each other.

"…Are you 100% sure you don’t vant somevon to try und help you?"

#robotbutnotarobot #aww haha #meanwhile my dogs ben kind of sick recently ;n; #he is really old though so #:c


posted 7 hours ago + 24 notes — via robotbutnotarobot
ametalmerc → ANON, VHAT ZHE FUCK

robotbutnotarobot:

ametalmerc:

robotbutnotarobot:

ametalmerc:

robotbutnotarobot:

Loud screeching and sparking and dying robot noises oh god the pain. 

"H-HhelP=PP=??! m, ,…"

 

"Hm. Zhat’s an odd quirk to put into a bot. Still, I’d razher prefer to see vhat exactly may or may not be damaged. Better safe zhan sorry." He was rather stubborn on trying to help the other doc.

"PLease. p-pplease!" He whirred and sparked panickedly. "Tthhhe quirkk is ffrom t-tttoo much ssssapping! It’ssss a s-sscar, almost!"

He let out an electronic sigh.

"Vell. Let’s just hope zhat nozhing has gone fatally wrong."

"O-Okayyyyy." He sighed in relief and went limp. "B-But could you pppplug me in t-to charggggE? I’m ttttired, aa-aand my arms w-wwwon’t wwwwork."

"Alright. Hold on a second."

It took Tesla a minute to figure out where exactly the plugs were in the room and the plug on Max.

"Zhere you go."

#robotbutnotarobot #haha that mustve been fun


posted 7 hours ago + 9 notes — via aussiemarksman
ametalmerc → Hallo!

aussiemarksman:

ametalmerc:

aussiemarksman:

aussiemarksman:

"Ah.." He tipped his hat up to view the robot better, slightly startled at hearing such a friendly message from him. Or at least, he assumed it was a him. "Yer a friendly? Not one a those.." He waved a hand and made a gun sign with his hand, "Ya know?"

image

"Likewise Mate." Mick answered with a soft smile and a nod, "I gotta ask though, what’s a friendly robot doin’ in these parts. Ain’t you worried someones gonna shoot first and ask questions later?"

"Vell, I just happen to vander around. Und so far, nobody’s done zhat. I’m careful to look around thoroughly before I tread. Even still zhough, I haff to be careful."

"That’s probably for the best then. I’d watch out for bloody spies if I were you mate. Not too sure if sappin’ can affect ya but better safe than sorry."

"Ja; sapping can still affect robots. Almost got sapped vonce vhen I vas near a half-destroyed sentry. Vas not fun."

#aussiemarksman #ive not played MVM either #but i watched the vids and also read the comics so


posted 7 hours ago + 12 notes — via accursedmedicine, © ametalmerc
accursedmedicine → "Since when did they start hiring robots?" //i like to think he died before the robots

accursedmedicine:

ametalmerc:

ametalmerc:

Ahah, zhe zhing is, I don’t ACTUALLY VORK for Mann. Co.”

At this point, Tesla’s seen just about everything. Now, an undead mercenary. He thought that mercs had respawn, so that this kind of thing wouldn’t happen…

 

"Zhat’s happened to me as vell, except I didn’t vant to deal vizh buffing zhe metal und getting dents out so I just took anozher medicbot’s arm. Alzhough it vas already destroyed, so…"

And if he was a Tree Friend, he would have probably died already by tripping over a rock or something.

"I see…" Yep, this conversation was going nowhere and getting increasingly awkward. "I suppose I’ve missed a lot of zhe going ons…can’t say I am very sad about zhat. I like living alone in my own personal base. I’m just because I’m hungry and unfortunately having a hard time finding humans…"

"Ah. Zhat doesn’t sound too fun. Vizh I could help you vizhout at least 8 mercs ready to behead me und ozher very uncomfortable zhings. I don’t haff respawning abilities, so ah, dying is a bit of an issue for me."

#accursedmedicine


posted 8 hours ago + 9 notes — via aussiemarksman
ametalmerc → Hallo!

aussiemarksman:

ametalmerc:

aussiemarksman:

ametalmerc:

aussiemarksman:

"Ah.." He tipped his hat up to view the robot better, slightly startled at hearing such a friendly message from him. Or at least, he assumed it was a him. "Yer a friendly? Not one a those.." He waved a hand and made a gun sign with his hand, "Ya know?"

image

"Ja, ja; I’m a friendly bot. Sort of ironic zhat I’m a Medic; I don’t particularly like to see somevon dead. My name’s Tesla. Who are you?"

"That’s a bloody relief then." He admitted, eyes flickering over the robot. He certainty sounded like a Medic, German accent and all. "Name’s Mick but most just call me Sniper around here considerin’ that’s my job and all."

"Nice to meet you zhen, Snipes." That was the nickname he had for Snipers. Why? It was a shortened form of Sniper AND it sounded kind of like a cookie, so why NOT?

"Likewise Mate." Mick answered with a soft smile and a nod, "I gotta ask though, what’s a friendly robot doin’ in these parts. Ain’t you worried someones gonna shot first and ask questions later?"

"Vell, I just happen to vander around. Und so far, nobody’s done zhat. I’m careful to look around thoroughly before I tread. Even still zhough, I haff to be careful."

#aussiemarksman #pizzapizza PIZZA #feed me hte pizza #tesla is better at looking at things than me lol


posted 8 hours ago + 13 notes — via unless-its-a-farm
ametalmerc started following you

unless-its-a-farm:

ametalmerc:

unless-its-a-farm:

"I’m done with the craziness, it’s why I retired! Now I don’t have to deal with it anymore."

"Yeah. I don’t zhink I’ll ever try to get in vizh zhe ozher mercs und I’ll sort of be an outlier."

"Well, you’ll always be welcome around here." Gives a smile. "It’s… mostly peaceful, ahah."

"It is nice out here. I zhink HAL likes it, too." He held his hand behind his head for a few seconds before holding it back out and revealing a sizeable grasshopper.

#unlessitsafarm #laughs into forever


posted 8 hours ago + 9 notes — via aussiemarksman
ametalmerc → Hallo!

aussiemarksman:

ametalmerc:

aussiemarksman:

"Ah.." He tipped his hat up to view the robot better, slightly startled at hearing such a friendly message from him. Or at least, he assumed it was a him. "Yer a friendly? Not one a those.." He waved a hand and made a gun sign with his hand, "Ya know?"

image

"Ja, ja; I’m a friendly bot. Sort of ironic zhat I’m a Medic; I don’t particularly like to see somevon dead. My name’s Tesla. Who are you?"

"That’s a bloody relief then." He admitted, eyes flickering over the robot. He certainty sounded like a Medic, German accent and all. "Name’s Mick but most just call me Sniper around here considerin’ that’s my job and all."

"Nice to meet you zhen, Snipes." That was the nickname he had for Snipers. Why? It was a shortened form of Sniper AND it sounded kind of like a cookie, so why NOT?

#aussiemarksman #i kinda wanna cuddle most mercs #lmao im kinda hungry atm and i had 2 bowls of pasta for dinner #granted one was zuchinni spaghetti but still